rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
She seriously spent 30 minutes trying to make balloon animals out of my limp dick...
...
Exactly.
Hey my results were negative. Your chlamydia train stops here. Happy hunting!
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
