i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I am self-sufficient. I puked in a wine glass and emptied it in the trash. Points for style and neatness
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
I think we r still a few steps from ex sex. In fact, that's never going to happen. I'm just saying on the seething-chemical-fire-of-emotional-distress-to-post -relationship-intercourse scale, I'm closer to fucking than throttling. Progress is fun.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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