No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I haven't been "cry when you eat ben and jerrys" high in a while.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
My dog just threw up a condom. Sorry for accusing you of not wearing one, I found it now.
I got a text saying, "It's so great to throw tomatoes at seagulls."
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Randomize
