at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
You really need to get over the whole "jail" thing. Its really not that bad.
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I wanna snuggle with you as we feed each other chipotle burrito bowls and that's just where I'm at right now
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
Randomize
