The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
You said, "can you make out with him for a little bit, I need a break."
Naked Twister starts at high noon
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
I'm done being subtle here. MOVE INTO MY EXTRA BEDROOM SO WE CAN FUCK WHENEVER AND NOT HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT FINDING PEOPLE TO HAVE CASUAL SEX WITH.
you live like 200 miles from me and I have two years of school left
goddamnit stop pointing out all the flaws in my plan
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
If I don't get struck by a lightning bolt from God by midnight it will be a Christmas miracle.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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