Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Liar. My heart is broken and my boobs are disappointed.
Sometimes intelligent conversation doesn't mix well with a romantic interest. It's possible the two are best kept separate. Toys should just stay in the toy box.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
