super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
i think i will get a tattoo on my butt that says "im not bluffin with my muffin", but i guess if i was serious, i would get it above my c-section scar
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I'm pregnant.
The fact that this number is not in my contacts is giving me hope it's a wrong number???
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
Things are coming back to me in chunks. I vaguely remember signing a shirt that said 'I enjoy vagina'
I AM SO PROUD OF YOU
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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