Drunken candy land NOW. Dont fight the urge... you want to.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
