i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
Dude. He drives a mini. Therefore he's a virgin
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
