She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
You can call me Bill Clinton. I brought 2 good looking Asians home last night.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Watching marley and me... this girls got me whipped man
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
You two kept repeating the same thing over and over. It was like looking after retarded pull-string dolls.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
I swear to god there was like a 2-second timespan in which he went from laughing to coughing, hiccuping, and subsequently projectile vomiting into the grass. There is literally a line in the grass, about 2 yards long, of his puke. It was more impressive than disgusting to be honest. And then he just shrugged and said "I have no idea where that came from."
Yeah, I've been trying to get him to eat healthier. Turns out he'll eat almost any fruit or vegetable as long I let him eat it off my body.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Nothing says happy Monday quite like coffee and oral sex.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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