the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
I walked into a McDonalds at 8:30 am with a half-eaten apple and a solo cup. Never felt so judged.
It's gameday bitch. Man up.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I've been trying to masturbate for the longest time now and so far I've accomplished getting tangled in my computer battery cord and phone charger and hitting my knee on my laptop.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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