Since you didn't call me back last night, I can only assume that in 9 months you're going to have a child that I'm going to refer to as, "Daddy's little mistake in Miami."
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
why do all canadians talk like horny gerbils are stuck in their throats?
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
The streets are paved with hand jobs
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