Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
Uh no. you let me handle it. trust me: I can paint the Mona Lisa in tints of bitch.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
