sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets
I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Best feeling in the world? holding your pee all day for a negative preggo test
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
my very deepest apologies for the unintentional cock block.
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