i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
i could totally date him if i was just drunk the whole relationship
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
He put crushed up bacon in the joint and now we're listening to the Matilda soundtrack I have no idea what's going on
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
He is currently in a meeting and I am sexting him in Italian
And he's using Google translate to reply. Who says cross country relationships can't be fun?
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
Randomize
