i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
i hooked up with a boy reading dear john, i have to get points for that somewhere
no he gets major points for having a girl hookup with him after reading dear john
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
I don't think he grasps the fact that I would much rather he finish inside me than on my $400 Anthropolgie bedspread
Just checked my phone. Sometime last night I googled sex positions in a tent. Was there even a tent there?
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
First of all, I don't like eggnog. Second of all too much rum is all bad. And thirdly I'm not there to sit in your lap and pretend you are Santa and I've been a bad girl.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
threw up outside of the dorms in the parking lot in the pouring rain on the first day of class, i'd say summer is off to a good start.
There should be an app that tazers me in my pocket when I'm spending too much money at the bar. Take a hint, Android Network. You slut.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
She's nice. But even when I am with her I am thinking of her mom, literally the hottest woman on earth.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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