Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
when i'm not drinking i'm making facebook events about drinking
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Before you even think your day was worse than mine, I had to disinfect and and stitch another dude's penis after his prince Albert got ripped out by an angry chick.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
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