I probably should have cut it off when he started putting queso on my nipples, but within ten minutes I was a self-serve burrito bar.
what is it with giant penises always finding me
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Disasters an understatement. Hurricane alpha chi omega hit. On my way to buy carpet cleaner, super glue, and a new liver. Be back soon.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I feel like it could help stop wars and begin world peace and the continents can unite for one Monday because chicken fries come back today
"Let's do body shots off the freshmen" is officially the worst thing I've ever said.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
