i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
omg this kid i'm babysitting is making a penis out of playdough ahhhh.
He just rolled me a 'baby penis' as opposed to his 'big boy' penis that he crafted...he just demanded that I roll him a penis.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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