Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
no sex. but he left me weed, so almost as good.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
sleazy september. first one with mono loses.
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
It is getting ridiculous, the elaborateness of the schemes I have to concoct so my suitemates don't know I'm pooping.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
