He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
i’m blowing bubbles in my bloody mary so yeah it’s pretty much time to go
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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