Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
I woke up in nothing but a shower cap and your sparkling coke straw snorter thing inbetween my toes. Explain.
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
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