she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
just so you're aware of it in the morning: you tried to slide down the railing on a snuggie. twice.
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
Carson kissed me on my cold sore before I could stop him so I think I gave my kid herpes. Mom of the year. Just call me MOTY.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Randomize