he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
Ive either hit rock bottom or become my own hero.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
He asked me if I wanted to blow his whistle and proceeded to pull out an actual whistle.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
No offense, but I don’t think I would want to see him in anything skimpier than a hazmat suit.
Randomize
