So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Thanks for making me watch you dance provacatively by yourself in the bathroom so you could see if you looked fat.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
Instead of centeral air we are getting a margaritaville machine. Thought you would enjoy our logic
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
Every concussion has its silver lining
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
