Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
The more my room-mate speaks, the more I notice that she was home schooled.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
She set fire to my carpet trying to power-dry puke covered cigs with Josh's blowtorch. How she found it in the garage is beyond me but if you bring her with you again I'll shoot you myself.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Bring me that man meat
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize
