he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
While drunk it seemed like a good idea to barricade my roommate in his room with everything that we could move in our apartment, waking up to him screaming from it collapsing on top of him was just an added bonus.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
