kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
I'm pretty sure I just overheard my boss call his sperm precious metal...
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
He turned me into a screamer. Guess I'm really not a lesbian.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
Last time I had a one night stand he ended up stalking me for two months.
So you're not picking up this weekend?
This weekend, I am Angela, visiting from Calgary. We'll have to roleplay this.
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