i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
She smells like mac and cheese, right after you add the cheese. It's strangely erotic.
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Rachel and his cat watched us 69 last night. I pretended to be embarrassed the next day... But to be honest I like an audience
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
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