marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
I always know im high when I can't remember how to pee.
Randomize
