I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
I wish my nipples were as well behaved as yours.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
