I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I just got invited to go home with a married couple...
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
i'm bringing homemade birthday cake and homegrown weed. how awesome is this text?
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