saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
This girl named her kid Rainforrest. If I die, just know it was from laughing so fucking hard.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
IF YOU DIE ON LSD YOU DIE FOR REAL
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
Randomize
