with your own penis?
I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
Just drove through Taco Johns wearing a drug rug and no pants. When I rolled down my window, the girl paused for a minute before saying "um... 4.07"
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Pretty sure if we keep hanging out on Tuesdays there will be no whiskey left for the younger generations or the universe will implode....tomato tahmato
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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