STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
Oh nbd. She just had sex with a divorcee. On a charter bus. At 10 a.m. On a Thursday.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I'm so lazy and tired i just want to cry and fall asleep in a bed of egg mcmuffins.
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Randomize
