I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Now I'll never know if Megan finds a millionaire.
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I was told I sang Taylor Swift's entire discography in between violent bursts of green vomit before falling asleep in the bath tub
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
I have never in my life been turned down for sex until this weekend.
Welcome to my everyday.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Randomize
