So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
There is an empty space on my boobs where glow paint should be.
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
I can't feel the bottom half of my face but i feel like our sex would be amazing
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
