You know that restaurant that is like over by home depot?
That shitty one? I heard the food sucks there
It's my parent's restaurant
There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
i woke up to banging and pieces of ceiling falling on my face
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize
