And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
No vaginas are yucky and I don't think you're old enough to handle one yet
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
I almost tased myself
I dont think you should own that device.
It's an awesome device. I love this device.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
You got naked in his car? Or the koala suit was in his car? One of those sounds a lot less slutty than the other......
Randomize
