It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
