You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
i had a dream last night that you and i organized a foursome. swear to god
ps i'll be in miami in early july. this text has no relation to the last one
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
She had a tattoo of Luke Bryan on her thigh and she made me waffles. Can I have two fiancees?
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
