making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
You okay? Last night you climbed through my window and demanded I take shots with you and when I refused you took a piss in my front yard.
that's your fault. you refused to take shots with me.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
Randomize
