we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
And tan into my neighbor in the elevator. She was going to the gym. I was covered in mascara and dog hair eating a hash brown
Yeah I mean subtle isn't how I'd describe your flirtation strategy last night
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
He’s going to a lawnmower race. I got a Brazilian and he’s racing a lawnmower race. Pick me up. I’m not wasting this waxing on John Deer
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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