Are we in a gay sports bar?
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
i waited two years for her to sleep with me. it just didnt seem worth it.
she lost her virginity three hours after you dumped her.
are you serious?
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize