my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize
