can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
My mother is a bitch. She just outed me to my dad. He wants to meet you by the way...
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Only in the emergency room do they shut the door when youre laughing too hard
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize