so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I'm not leaving my family to go to a strip club on good friday.
I may not be his cup of tea, but I bet I'm his 10th shot of tequila
I think weed is turning my hair brown
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
