we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
I woke up in my tom cruise outfit with my house key tied to my thong....
Have you ever looked death in the face and have the urge to shit yourself. I'm in that situation right now.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Babe, holding my hair while i blow you doesn't count as being romantic
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
Randomize
