So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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