she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
Oh man 11pm. That means it's time to take my shirt off an eat a brownie
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Randomize
