what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
it feels like my vag is blowing bubbles
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
We're so stoned that were both cuddling on the couch and crying over Forest Gump while eating popcorn. She asked me if I'd fuck away the sadness. I think she's serious.
Just reminding you that you are currently drunk spooning a chair saying it "loves you unconditionally". No more rum.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I washed my sheets. I did out of respect for my previous and current sexual partners.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
