He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
I tried calming him down but his eyes are rolling to the back of his head and he's yelling "COMA WEED!"
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
He broke into my house just to tell me the door was locked.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I just shit my bed. Go ahead and make your 40 year old incontinence jokes now.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
he just kept biting everyone and singing hilary duff songs. i can't even bring him to a gas station.
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